and then a reality check

how many blogs are there in the world of the "web" - thee "web"...cause i am sure that some fecker has just written exactly what i have just written over the last few entries (ha, he said entries(and he spelt it wrong . get a typing course( get a punctuation course)and what did i say about the spelling?) i have allowed myself this luxury) - out of the billions of entries(that word again) and i am fooling myself that this is the first of what has just been said - WHAT? oh, dinner time... ok, coming in.

How many writers today use a spell check?

in fact i think i will, or at least til i go to bed.

you could do this all night

yes printing...

What has just happened is that I have ... i hate sever side communication

maybe i gotta sign out then

Here is my problem - I have the talent and not the need - all great art comes from poverty - if they try to pay you, refuse, or at least drink or inject the profits (injection a surer bet and less competition after overdose statistic taken into account) (AND THE YOUNG will flood in all their stupidity and beauty - THE YOUNG THE YOUNG passed me by)
so hewre is my problem - i have the need but not the talent - all great art comes from craft - if they try to pay you, refuse, or at least take a season at a country manor - and be sure to kill a wild animal as a graduation - to what? well, just ask an established food critic.

By the way and as a disclaimer, I am not advocating the use of mind altering drugs, especially at an abusive level (but then what is an abuse level?), I would just like clarification on these matters.

This is the best clarification I have found...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jSH6ofHbeUw

Read a story a few days ago about the revaluation of psychedelic substances for medicinal purposes - whether the stigma can ever be lifted from such drugs as LSD is questionable - Manson, kids jumping off roofs, adults smashing windows after suffering violent flashback, etc etc.

I always wondered about the term "controlled substance" - who controls it and to what means? Not wanting to become too conspiratorial in this line of thinking which will result in an authority bashing spree, it always seemed to me that the drugs that tend to do nothing for you except make you docile and obedient (alcohol, nicotine) are the drugs that are controlled the most - through taxation, supply, quality. And those drugs that can open doors to new experience (psychedelics) are the least controlled - criminality, quality, non-taxation but the ones most likely to end you up in trouble with the law.
Coincidence... I don't know.

Wham bam thank you mam - Maybe mr lichtenstein was right - the bully should always be put out - and spinach was the excuse -

damn spray paint going to the head again...

So there, after all the huffing and puffing, the nashing of teeth, the rants and raves and ridicules, the postulations and pathetic excuses, yes, i finally did it - i quit smoking! and how fecking easy it was too.
After giving allen carr a busted apple review a few months back (or is it more than that? goes to show how long i have been trying to give up) i finally pulled through - saw the reason and the light. So to anybody who wants to give up smoking now - this is all i will say, yes, it does taste great now but you still know how daft it is and if you wish to quit, don't quit at quitting - just keep trying. Good luck.

Other than that, I think i said a while back that i would use this blog as a diary about my attempts to quit smoking - since that has been done, i had better give it another function - hmmmm

and here is an example of the other layout that I hadn't finished last night and instead put up one of those daft shadow pictures of myself - no, sorry, the last post was the one I was supposed to put up last night - this is the design i have been working on today - as well as making soup...

not enough hours in the day - but as chris rock has siad, the difference between a job and a career -yeahm I'm not going to explain somebody else´s joke - you have the web at your fingers, go look it up.
Anyhow, here is another of the designs that I am working on at the moment - but don't know about the image - will have to find another - but at least it gives the impression...

Kids brithday parties this weekend - have already made the soup for the family party on Saturday - tastes good if i may say so myself - well, I just did.

so instead, a graphic of something from the Wrecking Ball Diplomats - ok ok ok ok - that is NOT from the WBD since it seems that i have lost the lot on didgital form - but that is the shadow of the WBD.

and yet another - all these will be published on the google account that i created for the clients - with more colours and images/backgrounds - ----- ok, just checked the 4th idea and there was nothing thee except a psd file, the bones of what is to be posted. on the way

and another -

here is another -

Been working on a redesign for a golf club - here is one of the offers -

A scan from an art pad that I then blew up, printed out and tried to paint in a cohesive manner onto a canvas - it didn't work so i painted over it somewhat and did something else, which i can't quite remember, but it looked good and is on a wall somewhere ask i type - haha fools!!! Maybe it is my wall - shit...

I got some advice about quitting smoking that has seemed to stick in my craw - the advice comes from the Alan Carr book, that book that I have derided in the past and which seems now to be the best possible solution to my giving up problem - but the advice came from somebody else in a reformulated way - not that the concept, the kernel, of this advice is hard to understand, I just never saw the importance of it after I read the Carr book but now believe it to be the essence of quitting for good. My friend said to me that every cigarette being smoked ultimately makes you want to smoke the next one - so to break the chain, I must concentrate on that final cigarette and then afterwards convince myself that i am a happy nonsmoker. Simple, heh?

Some days are better than others.
It's difficult to realize how many of the works I produce are just purely inspirational i.e. automatic, and how many possess any degree of skill. Is there any difference between the two? I have seen many works where this line is undoubtedly blurry.
And so, the days that I realize that nothing of what I do holds any sense of skill or merit, are the days that I want to just give up. Other days I am drunk :-)

more pen work from the boredom box - oh where was i sitting when this was preformed? Maybe on the bus or walking to the corner shop to buy a pack of tabs.

another piece done in the same light - this time on a piece of copenhagen council stationary - will i get busted for copyright?

some of the doodles are done with the most basic of materials... ballpoint on a4 writing pad for instance. I think this was done while watching the clock in danish class. is it a SP - perhaps.

I am going to start to use this blog for more than just my own personal whinges. So here goes - let us see how long it lasts - I have a very strong snese of myself and know that when I start something I hardly finish it or keep it ongoing - unless I have a deadline or am being paid, that is.
I will post a load of drawings here - what has to be remembered when viewing these drawings is that most of them are doodles - little things I do to pass the time perhaps at the smae time as I listen to the radio or watch a film - they act as generators of bigger ideas, symbols, colours, arrangements etc etc.

I am getting the uncomfortable feeling of age and annoyance of professional football creeping up on me. Why these two things you may ask - growing old and the most beautiful game in the world? Well, I matched a match last night, Celtic vs Arsenal and realised that, this sport, art even, has succumbed to what at the end of the day we all have seemed to be trapped by - money. You must know what I mean? At this level of football there is no way for any other team to break into what the big clubs have - except of course, with a huge injection of cash. It will be interesting to see how, after all their spending, Man City will come up with. I have heard it so many times, other managers saying that money can't buy you a winning team, so how then could the "big 4" of the english premiership stay on top if it weren't for the money?
With age come cynism, so I have been told - and it annoys me that in the past I was able to watch Celtic play and hope beyond hope that they might just win - why not? They did it in the past. And I watched, bypassing the commercials, the prawn sandwiches etc etc hoping...
But last night even that hope passed me by as I was brainwashed into thinking that this is ok - and cynism took over telling me that it not ok.
Sell sell sell...

thanks for rain, cigarettes, thumbs and the ability to remember long distance memories from the hint of an aroma on the street.

Message? There is no message! That is the message.

After having watered the valuable plants, I stole the cd's, watched the misgivings of the world - Nato, manmade waves, doctor who and a dead iguana - and fled so as to begin the appeasement of the recruitment agency. They want proof, goddammit, and I ain't got any - so a circle of lies and deciet must be generated - wonderful, my potential shall actually be used today.

sometimes, everything just goes too blue, or pink, or green - sometimes brown, when they all intermingle then converge on a single point and explode like some gigantic atomic shitbomb. But, the worst is when it is all blue - that primary emotion, as the colour, envelops everything and only blackness can supply any respite. Then pink, (the two colours of childhood, depending on what side of the fence you tended to be conceived on) with it's red, primary again, and then an ample splash of purity, of light - blood and divinity - why should Christ not wear pink? More suited than pure white, methinks.

But yellow, clean buttercup yellow - a splash of yellow on everything - melting butter on fresh toast - there to disappear, only to be savoured and then remembered.

6 months or thereabouts later and nothing, like the vodka, absolute, nothing, has changed - just older, grumpier and more disenchanted.

Sleep, glorious sleep. Have not been getting my usual 8 hrs the past few days and needed to recuperate, so napped on the sofa while the kids played computer lego - whatever that is.